So I was recently doing an interview for an information site I’m working on for the Cook County Jail and it really opened my eyes to a lot of the horrible things that go on in nasty jails. I have to specify the ‘nasty’ part because there are some that really aren’t all that bad, as evidenced by what I’ve learned about the Utah County Jail.

What? TheGoont thought jail was fun before? No, no, silly. Of course I’ve seen TV and movies where jail or prison is portrayed as this incredulously horrible place with the gangs and the violence and other detestable things that go on behind bars. However, movies and TV also teach me that Nazis stole the ark of the covenant and Harrison Ford got it back. There’s a level of disbelief or separation as a result.

Listening to an ex-inmate give his opinion of his time he spent in jail in Chicago was a completely different approach. I was talking to a real person who was really there and really hated it. He was offered protection by a black gang leader in exchange for some of his goods from the commissary and/or meals. He brought to light the depressing nature of being made to line up like children, not speak out, and wait in line in your underwear to trade out the uniform you’ve been wearing for a week straight. It really makes you appreciate some of the things it’s easy to take for granted.

I admittedly have a very weak understanding of human physiology, but from personal experience that the body typically has good built in defenses. You got some nasty bacteria in you? You sneeze it out. You cut yourself, platelets come in and scab it over for protection. You get too hot, you sweat to cool yourself off. These are all pretty gross examples, I guess, but it shows a trend.

There’s one defense I can’t seem to find though. That is against stress, as in the feeling one receives when buying carpet. In fact, the body handles stress quite the opposite. Rather than start pumping out endorphins or something useful, it tends to cause physical ailments that are unpleasant and, unfortunately, add to your stress. Anyone know why that is? I don’t really expect an answer. Just musing…

Jon, our resident liquid expert, stated that our standard cups by the water cooler held 6 ounces of water (or any other liquid, for that matter). I was quite sure they held eight. We conducted an experiment to decide how much it held by filling up the cup and then pouring it into my water bottle (one of those with the volume markings on the side). Sure enough, it surpassed eight ounces and even just barely went over nine. Welp, Jon. Looks like you’re moded.

While I think Phil Stacey from American Idol this season is a talented singer, but there are definite resemblances. Don’t believe me? I threw together a side-by-side comparison of him and a Chihuahua. Thank goodness for and Paint.NET, another one of my free, must-have software.

So I went to play basketball with some guys from my church this morning because I’m feelin’ pretty fat. I’ve done this off and on over the past month or two and I’m still trying to decide if, though it is a good way to lose weight, it’s actually healthy. When I play in the morning I’m tired all day. I’m sore. My brain ticks just a little slower. And then I’m even more tired the next day. When it’s finally about time for me to recover, it’s time to play basketball again. And on it goes. I’m just really not sure how much good it’s doing me!

Not much to say but, daaaang. So Zap! which makes (in my opinion) typically ugly and impractical electric cars, just unveilled their new Zap-X concept car worthy of drooling over. It’s designed by Lotus, packs some mad stats (see below), and hopefully will bring the price down step by step as it competes with my also-favorite but expensive Tesla. What can you do to support Zap? Go ahead and get some of their consumer-end portable electronic device rechargers at Sewell Direct.

Pictures and specs below.

Drive Train
100% Electric; 4 electronic wheel hub motors sporting an aggressive 644 horsepower with super capacitor energy bursts

Speed
0 to 60 mph in 4.8 seconds with top speed of 155 mph

Mileage & Range
350 miles per charge; about 1 cent per mile; rapid 10 minute re-charge; 9,000 life cycles

Interior
Seating for 5 +2 with European ergonomic design; all electronic touch screen controls on-board carputer: Windows XP, Wi-Fi, Blue-tooth, High definition video, iPod ready, Fire wire, USB2 and Mini USB ports

Extras
Keyless bio-metric entry and ignition, Photovoltaic glass:
thermoelectric, for heating and cooling, energy collecting windows
and windshields to harness solar energy

Standard Features
APX Light Weight Aluminum
Architecture Design
Electronic Braking System (EBS)
Rack and Pinion Steering
Solar Glass
Lithium Batteries
(Bio-degradable Non-Explosive)
Power Windows
Power Door Locks
Power Steering
GPS
On Board Carputer with
Full Entertainment System

Dimensions
Length: 15 4 (4697 mm)
Width: 6 8 (1852 mm)
Wheel base: 8 9 (2700 mm)
Track: Front 5 1(1554 mm)
Rear 5 1(1556 mm)

As a result of some positive hearsay regarding the movie, and in spite of the lackluster films Williams has been in recently, I decided to see Man of the Year (free with a promo code at RedBox, so don’t worry, I didn’t pay for it). The political action thriller comedy documentary love story didn’t win me over, though. It tried to be too many movies at once and wound up going nowhere with any one genre.

For example, the movie definitely has a comedic approach. The comedy is very classic Robin Williams in my book (that’s not a good thing). It was also surprisingly and unnecessarily lewd comedy with 70% relating to either boobs or farts. Simply not impressed. So, not a great comedy.

The comedy portion also served to devalue the other elements of the film, like the thriller side. A large portion of the movie (spoiler alert) was devoted to the story of the girl who works at Delacroy (I think that was the name, not worth looking up), the company that produces the polling machines for the major US elections. She discovers a horribly irrational flaw in the system that resulted in Williams’ character winning the presidential election. The company, of course, needs to stop her at all costs so the public doesn’t find out there’s a glitch, blah blah blah. Jeff Goldblum didn’t make a great bad guy, but not a bad bad guy either. But by any means, any potential moments of real suspense were watered down by a cut scene to Williams joking around with his production buddies (including Christopher Walken, who was the shining star and possibly only redeeming factor to the film).

I won’t go into detail on the rest of it. Suffice it to say that the attempt to throw in the political jabs (Dobbs’ [Williams] political stance is to pull power from the lobbyists and special interest groups to give it back to the people), a love story (of course the president falls in love with the glitch-finding girl), a tech movie (disturbingly bad logic in how she discovers the computer’s bug and what the flaw is), and so forth was simply too much for the movie. Don’t see it. Spend your $1 elsewhere, perhaps on the new Bond.

Eyner works here at Sewell Direct and is a pretty good sport. So when we went to Burger King today and saw some job applications laying out, we thought it would be good fun to fill one out on his behalf. This is a less serious version of one of the office pranks that Jim pulls on Dwight on NBC’s hit series. It’s milder in that we’re probably not going to send this in to BK for reals. But I may just stop by for another Whopper Jr. But I better not forget my cell phone, because it may wind up in the ceiling.

Pictures follow.

Front Side

Back Side

In a sort of price battle between the big fast food chains, there seems to be an increasing trend in making a “value menu” for those who want to go spend $2 on lunch. I’m all for these, especially as they have brought out some some pretty good one dollar burgers. I’ve broken them down in to my personal favorites and rank them as follows:

1. The Junior Bacon Cheeseburger from Wendy’s

   Why it’s worth your $1: Good selection of ingredients (burger, lettuce, tomato, cheese, bacon, mayo). Pretty consistent good flavor (I’ve had some that were a little bleh). This burger also doesn’t feel super greasy like you might expect, which is probably the only reason it takes number one over:

2. The Junior Whopper from Burger King

   Why it’s worth your $1: This one wins the straight up flavor contest. Best taste for a buck in my book. The downside to that is that it feels greasy as you eat it. The ingredients are all there: a good burger patty, lettuce, tomato, onion, cheese and mayo. I think the produce on these taste better than the JBC (Junior Bacon Cheeseburger - learn this lingo, it’ll make you look cool), but the deep-fried burger patty makes up for it all so it’s not too healthy.

3. Spicy Chicken Sandwich from Carl’s Jr:

   Why it’s worth your $1: This takes my top pick for the cheap-o chicken sandwich. The spiciness covers up the cheapness of a fried chicken patty. Plus, the actual quality of the hyper-processed chicken tastes more like real chicken in flavor and texture than other cheap patties. The only reason this sandwich even fell from it’s #1 spot is that they quit putting the tomato on it (though they still usually use the good buns). My recommendation if you get one: get the sweet and sour dipping sauce with it and pour it on top for a twist.

4. Crispy Chicken Sandwich from Wendy’s:

   Why it’s worth your $1: This definitely tastes like processed meat and very fried. It’s not great, which is why it’s at #4. It’s not horrible, but not very good either. Only get it if you’re tired of the JBC but already got in the Wendy’s line and someone’s behind you.

5. Double Cheeseburger at McDonald’s:

   Why it’s worth your $1: I’m not a big fan of McDonald’s food in general, so this may be a disproportionately biased review of this burger. I can’t say exactly what it is, but it is the most fake-feeling food I’ve ever really eaten. Anyway, it’s still only a buck and if you’re stopping by a redbox anyway to rent a movie, grab it and a vanilla cone. You’re out just under $2 and it’s the vanilla washes away the weird aftertaste.

So there you go. I hope you feel enlightened. Combine that with the best hole-in-the-walls and you’ll be eating yummy stuff on a decent budget for weeks.

I wasn’t horribly interested in the most recent Bond flick when I first heard about it. The only other Bond movies I’ve seen have typically left me underwhelmed - an invincible spy that kills bad guys and uses women while always keeping his cool - it’s just too easy of a movie. It doesn’t stretch your imagination.

Casino Royale, on the other hand, seemed to take a different approach (which it could do because it is the “beginning” of Bond). The future emotionless 007 had emotion, but a personality that would easily evolve into the completely cool James of the future Bond movies. Throw in a great chase scene with a freestyle walker, an interesting love story, and the story behind the ever-beautiful Aston Martin, and I was sold.