Jacob says:

“I was in the cougar eat, debating with a friend whether or not I’m filmed constantly like truman burbank. So I shouted out SHAZAM! And only two people out of fifty looked. THEREFORE, I AM THE TRUMAN SHOW.”

I hope you’re all satisfied.

Jacob’s quote was not just made up for making up’s sake. It was an actual quote to a girl after a class. Apparently he and another guy were talking about how cute and little the girl was (because she was present and listening) and then told her she was unique. In class, they had been talking about structuralism so, in Jacob’s own words, “it all fit.”

“It’s your uniqueness that makes you unique, and I’m validated in making this claim because I’ve kissed 20 girls.”

- Jacob, talking to himself in his very own head.

Jacob’s quote of the day: “In the library (this is a University library, mind you) today, I saw this dude pick his nose and eat the booger. This is an RM we’re talking about here and he should have kicked that habit at least six years ago.”

“I stopped eating my boogers when I was ten. Maybe nine.”

Thank you, Jacob.